I expect most people in our society to have some social awareness and basic manners but both seem to be dwindling, rapidly. Some blame it on our isolation during the Covid pandemic as though in that year we lost the ability to interact with each other properly and extend common courtesy. I’ve seen people in stores who feel totally entitled to block an entire aisle with their cart and body as they take their sweet time looking at product labels. Politely ask to get by and you get the stink eye. Good grief!
Others cite smartphone addiction as a culprit to bad manners. And it’s true that I’ve seen far too many people out together in a restaurant all on their phones avoiding each other. Or walking down the street nearly colliding with folks because they are glued to their phone screens. And I know we’ve all had to endure hearing loud, one-sided phone conversations when we are out and about.
And I am aghast at parents who let their children run amuck at totally inappropriate places. I sound so old saying this, but my parents wouldn’t have tolerated that and I didn’t in my daughters. A few years back while dining in an upscale restaurant two couples at a table near us had brought their very young children. And one let their fussy toddler roam by their table getting in the way of other patrons and the wait staff carrying plates of hot food. Then the baby started crying and they seemed nonplussed and just carried on talking. If you can afford this restaurant you can afford a babysitter.
Where I live some folks have no respect for others’ property. There are two top complaints that show up time and time again on Nextdoor.com. One, dog owners who do not clean up after their dogs which seems the epitome of bad manners. For Pete’s sake, pick up your dog’s poop! And two, people who feel perfectly at ease coming into a stranger’s yard and stealing the fruit off their trees, which extends beyond bad manners into illegality. And most of the home owners admitted that if the person had just asked if they could have some of the fruit, the owners would have shared. Instead they feel violated and angry.
And frankly I am horrified that so many on social media feel absolutely comfortable responding to a strangers’ posts with slurs, obscenities and degrading remarks. It happens all the time. A woman posted a picture of her middle-aged self in a bathing suit in her Facebook group. She was smiling and totally at ease with her more curvy figure. Some man felt compelled to comment “You fat cunt.” And he wasn’t alone. Other men chimed in with derogatory remarks. Why? What is wrong with you??
I think in part some people have been emboldened by our current U.S. president who mocks the disabled, calls female journalists piggy and has a total disconnect when fat shaming other politicians. He quite literally has no manners, no decorum, no empathy and delights in mocking people and name calling. He has set the bar so low and some people seem fine with it. Is this the world you want to live in?!
I do wonder if young people today even know what constitutes good manners or common courtesy. Simple things like holding open doors for people, covering a sneeze or a cough, respecting someone’s personal space, giving up a seat to a senior citizen, saying thank you to a sales clerk. Recently I was in line in a grocery store with one item. The young man in front of me had at least 40 items and he saw I had one. Instead of suggesting I go before him, he continued unloading his cart. It was the older 50s-something sales clerk who waved me forward and rang me up first.
Maybe I’m jaded but it just seems when I was younger strangers treated each other with more respect, courtesy and good manners.
Thoughts?
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