Today's Women of Age

By the time I reached this stage of life, I assumed I would have it “all together.” My life and choices would reflect wisdom honed from decades of life. Sadly reality doesn’t always bear that out! Some parts of my life are tickety-boo, but I have allowed some less salubrious activities to become habits. Bad habits.

One of them is falling asleep watching TV on my laptop in bed. I’ve been doing it for years, but it doesn’t help the quality (or quantity) of my sleep. I know I need to stop, but it’s hard. 

Dr. Stephanie Collier (instructor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School) shares: “Often, habits that don’t benefit us still feel good, since the brain releases dopamine. It does this with anything that helps us as a species to survive, like eating or sex. Avoiding change qualifies as survival, and we get rewarded (albeit temporarily), so we keep reverting every time. That’s why it’s so hard.”

Throw into the mix that habits strengthen over time. So if you been engaging in an activity or pattern for years, it will take some time to fully break it—studies suggest from 18 to 250 days!

I used to watch the TV show “My 600 Lb. Life” and I was always impressed with the folks who managed to turn from eating an enormous diet of fast food, takeaways and sweets to the minimal and fresh food plan advised by Dr. Nowzaradan. It wasn’t always smooth sailing for participants. Some failed. And I understand it. Food was often their only pleasure. But what made the difference in those who succeeded was acknowledging how miserable and unhealthy they were and finally allowing that to motivate them to change.

Without self-motivation nothing’s going to improve. My step-mother was a hoarder and her overflowing house made it difficult for her and my dad to live comfortably. Whenever I visited she promised she was going to clean up and stop buying things. But she never did. Logically she knew she should and she promised she would, but the dopamine hit from finding treasures and bringing them home was too great.

But with self-motivation it is possible!

Once you are 100% committed to changing, set small goals to get started. If you have a sweet tooth and are trying to break a sugar addiction, perhaps set a goal of allowing just one sugary treat a day instead of three. If you know at 3:00 p.m. your energy flags and that’s one of the times you reach for cookies or candy, prepare a substitute snack ahead of time (fruit, nuts, cheese). If you flub up one day, don’t quit. Be kind to yourself. And try again the next day.

Tips to Break a Bad Habit

• Start small.
• Set goals.
• Know your triggers.
• Change your routine.
• Find healthy substitutes.
• Find an “accountability person.” I’ve realized how important it can be to have someone we have to report to. Ideally not a spouse or close friend.
• Find cheerleaders.
• Chart your success.
• Don’t give up if you “fall off the wagon” a time or two.
• Reward yourself.